politically hilarious

THE MAYOR of a city in a developing country invited the mayor of another municipality over for dinner. The visitor was very impressed with his host’s affluent lifestyle and asked him how he managed to live so well. "See that bridge?", the first mayor said, pointing to a distant structure. "Five percent."

The visiting mayor went home and six months later invited the first mayor over to his new mansion. The first mayor was astounded and asked his friend the secret to his sudden wealth.

"See that bridge?", the second mayor said, gesturing out a nearby window.

"What bridge?", asked the visitor.

"One Hundred percent." - Atul Suraiya (taken from Reader’s Digest

the tao of homer

Feeling lost and adrift? Gain inner peace from reading Homer. No, not the Greek guy. Homer Simpson. Here are some Homeric jewels to live by.

- "The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle. They're on TV."

- "What's the point of going out? We're just going to end up back here anyway."

- "Trying is the first step towards failure."

- "You can't keep blaming yourself. Just blame yourself once and move on."

- "Doughnuts. Is there anything they can't do?"

- "The three little sentences that will get you through life. No. 1: Cover for me. No. 2: Oh, good idea boss. No. 3: It was like that when I got here." (-lifeisajoke.com)